COMPASSION

The last year has been strenuous and heartbreaking. To find out the desecration of my grandparent’s tombstone was condoned by the owner’s

of St. Mary’s cemetery the Catholic church. I recently discovered this, and could not believe how Rev. Hafeman treated me. All I asked him for was to help me. He knew all about it already. He played a bigger part in this than I had thought. You will never know how devastated we were

when we received that information. My mother was born Frances Mary Suchoruke. To deny her the right to have her name on her own parent’s tombstone still brings us to tears. Joseph Cherwak had the right to have his name also engraved there, he was my grandmother’s only surviving son from the Ukraine,and had become an American citizen and fought in WW2. I was under the wrong impression, Shaun Parker knew this but

led me to believe that he had some authority to remove my inscription and put it back the way it was as it was before. I now know that you went to the Catholic church with my relatives to have it sandblasted off. You gave them what they wanted, now I have to go against the Catholic church.

Why were my relatives upset by that beautiful engraving, and who could be so heartless to actually do it? I’m learning once again how cruel this town can be. I had to suffer along with my family for years as people we had known our whole lives turned away from us. Mothers listened

to their children who told them not to pick us up and drive us in their cars to school anymore. That’s you Mr. Gerald Gray, why would you think I would ever forget that? I can still feel your anger when my sister and I were being driven to St. Mary’s school.  One day we did not see your car anymore, you had asked her to go another way. I would never forgive you for that, you were not taught about compassion at home you spoiled

brat. The same thing happened when we were being driven in a car to middle school. All of the sudden the car was not going are way. I was told

by my friend that the 2 other girls did not want to ride with us in the car. Those 2 girls were Debbie Wilcox and Kathy Gore. No wonder I turned

rebellious I was in pain from their actions and thought less of myself. No one who hurts my sister would ever be my friend. We  learned more about how to treat others by watching the shows Insight and Davy and Goliath then we ever learned at church. My rebellious nature after being

treated so badly by these people hurt me so much. I wore mini skirts and smoked and skipped school. I could not bear seeing my sister in the special ed class. I could actually feel her pain. It just about killed me, and having the Jewells move next door at that time made everything so much worse. Bobby Jewell

was torturing my family and his parents did not care. They let him bang on our windows at night, and throw balls at our house. They said he was just playing! No I watched him and his friends giggle as they did not aim at the basketball net ,but at our car or house instead. He was a bully!

With my long hair and mini skirts I eventually attracted the attention of the first boy I ever kissed. Guess who it was? You can’t? It was the notorious Mike Barber who lived by me and would follow me home with  his posse which included his cousin Kevin Pelton ( who was sent home

from school one day for wearing too tight shorts!) also in Mike’s posse was the charismatic Harvey Freeman. Well this is what happened, Mike said

that no one was home at is house and asked me if I wanted to see it? I was so innocent that I said yes!  He quickly gave me a tour and then he showed me his bedroom. Meanwhile the posse was talking to him via their walkie talkies. They stayed outside he asked me if I wanted to make out

with him? I actually did not know what that entailed. We were soon kissing and I suddenly got very concerned “why are you getting so hot?” I said.

His face was red and he was breathing funny. He suddenly realized that I did not know anything. He said “you  should go home now Nancy” and I left.

I walked home wondering what I had done wrong. He was cool about it because he just went on to the next girl on his long list of  potential con guests .  He

was a real player. When he saw me at the bowling alley with Tom he looked over and watched us ( he knew poor Tom would soon be very disappointed.) We would hitch hike to the places we went and always had a nice couple pick us up. That’s how we got to the bowling alley where

we played the jute box. We would drink milk shakes at Burger King and talk. When we ran into Laurie Phillips and her boyfriend we started hanging around with them. OMG they were doing everything.  That was when Tom told me I could be popular too. I begged him to tell me over and over.

He was so nice but very embarrassed and would only say “don;t you see what Laurie is doing?” We did kiss but only once and he moved on. I was

just a baby.  My first real crush was in the 8th grade. The minute I saw Phillip Ballatore my heart raced, I could not breath when he was around.

He was it. He wasn’t popular, he did not have to be he had girls at his beck and call. He was going out with one of my sophisticated friends Gloria

Clark. She told me all about him and how they were always making out. Gloria was mature for her age and I just was not catching up. All I know is

I had a big crush on him. I can still remember him and how he looked, he was so sexy that he could tell  that I would be a waste of his time. He did

not play sports he only had one thing on his mind. In 9th grade I still was trying to get him to notice me. I pined away for him. One day I saw him walking around with an older girl named Anna. I asked my friends ” is that his girlfriend?” One out of many, but a few months later she was looking

different.  Yes she was going to have his baby!  Philip Ballatore broke my heart.  Yes Jerry Gray I noticed your hi-chinks but you were too everything too popular( I can still hear people asking you to do your Howard Cosell imitation.) You were always with somebody and always had

lots of girlfriends. Why did you play those mind games with me, you really hurt me I liked you too. You were just playing a game with me and it

was cruel.  I should have known by how you treated Marsha that I would have nothing to do with you. That was my policy . You were not

a compassionate boy and if you are not taught that when you are young.  You don’t suddenly change your spots when you get older. You could

have done something to stop what Shaun Parker did, but you didn’t. You are still the same , you have no compassion. You opened a free legal

clinic to show people that you are a good person. It was an image decision on your part, a step in the right direction for yourself.  You want

others to think well of you. No one thinks more well of themselves than you. You are a phony, always looking out for what’s best for you. That was once your family’s business and probably

could have stopped what happened,but you did nothing you did not care!

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